“You can never really live anyone else’s life, not even your child’s. The influence you exert is through your own life, and what you’ve become yourself.”
– Eleanor Roosevelt
In last week’s article, we explored the source of deep inner security; clarity of understanding (aka your ‘grounding’). In this week’s article, we’re going to be stepping back and getting an overview of the Effortless Influence model, looking at each of its elements in a nutshell.
You can remember the elements of the Effortless Influence model using the word “CALLINGS”. The word ‘calling’ also serves as a reminder that the model is grounded in (and relies upon) a connection to your own uniqueness, passion and purpose. The 7 elements are as follows:
C – Connection
The context for effortless influence is always connection and relationship. A felt sense of connection is like the WD-40 of influence. Connection is a natural quality for everyone when there’s nothing else in the way. Relationships that are built on a sense of connection and shared values can be incredibly influential. Relationship and a felt sense of connection is the ‘transformation superhighway’ for influence. Relationships are developed over time. The more visible you are to the people you’re here to serve, the easier it is to grow relationships with them.
A – Alignment
The more authentic you are, the easier it is for people to trust you, and to decide whether or not you’re a good fit for them. When you’re aligned with your inner sense of purpose and direction, it’s easy for other people to align themselves with you. Your sense of passion, purpose and authenticity are powerful attractors.
L – Listening
Most people have forgotten how to listen. Listening deeply to another person, with nothing on your mind, can have a powerful impact. People feel connected to you, and together you uncover new opportunities and come up with creative solutions. While everyone knows listening is important, very few people listen deeply. When someone does, they make a difference.
L – Leadership
Influence means leading; leading yourself and leading others. This means stepping up and risking criticism and failure. It means being true to yourself, despite the cost. It means being willing to move into the unknown without a map; trusting your wisdom and developing your own creative process. It means being courageous, taking risks and learning from your mistakes.
I – Influence Intelligence
The principles of influence are well documented, but most people don’t create a space to deepen their understanding of these principles. As a result, they know them intellectually, but don’t truly ‘get’ them. You can’t learn to ride a bicycle by reading a book, and you won’t get a deep understanding of influence without practice and experimentation. Start now!
N – Needs
Needs, wants and desires… Problems, issues and solutions… One of the keys to effortless influence is uncovering people’s problems, needs, wants and desires, then helping them satisfy them. When you take what you’re most inspired to do, and align it with people who deeply want and need it, it makes you incredibly influential.
G – Grounding
“Grounding” refers to your embodied understanding of the inside-out nature of life. When a person doesn’t have a deep grounding, they get caught up in superstitious thinking, and can come across as needy, insecure or busy-minded (the ‘influence exterminators’). As you deepen your grounding, you’ll experience greater mental clarity, connection, and a deeper feeling for life. People will be naturally drawn towards you, enjoying the time they spend in your presence. When it comes to impact & influence, grounding is the determinant of your impact with clients, and your business results.
S – Service Orientation
Effortless Influence relies on a service-orientation; a genuine commitment to creating value for others. Among other things, this means that serving a person has to be more important than getting them to approve of you.
I do my best to ‘model’ the Effortless Influence model in everything I do. You can see it in action, while deepening your own understanding, by exploring the audios, articles and videos here at www.JamieSmart.com.
There are also a few seats left for my ‘Secrets of Effortless Influence’ talk on the evening of Friday, October 25th in London. You can book your place here: https://www.jamiesmart.com/the-secrets-of-effortless-influence/
To your increasing clarity,
Best
Jamie
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