We’ve each had the experience (even if only occasionally) of feeling deeply connected with ourselves, with another person and even with life itself. And everyone’s had the experience (even if only occasionally) of feeling isolated, disconnected and alone. Both of these polarities are universal aspects of the human experience, and an understanding of them is incredibly powerful when it comes to coaching with clarity. In this article, we’re going to explore the power of connection to facilitate deep transformative experiences for you and the people you want to impact.
So the first question to ask is “Where does connection come from?” To answer this question I’d like to draw a distinction between the experience of connection and the fact of connection:
The Fact of Connection: In his fascinating video, “A Universe From Nothing”, the physicist Lawrence Krauss gives a brilliant, eloquent and elegant proof that the universe has arisen from nothing; from a sea of formless energy. While I’m pretty sure Krauss would shudder at the buoyant and hopeful conclusions I draw from what he’s saying, the fact of the matter is that we’re each made of the “nothingness” from which the universe sprang. Another way of describing this nothingness is “formless energy”. On one level, we can experience ourselves as separate from each other, and distinct from our physical environment. This is a practical matter; as well as having strong survival value, it makes it easy to know whose teeth to brush. But on another level, it seems to be a matter of fact that we are all made of this same formless energy. Like waves in an ocean, we are all part of the same undivided wholeness. Just as waves don’t leave the ocean and “go solo”, we are never disconnected from this infinite ocean of energy. This is the fact of connection.
The Experience of Connection: The experience of connection is often described as a feeling of love and closeness combined with rapport. People sometimes say “We just clicked” or describe themselves as being on the same wavelength. The felt experience of connection is an expression of the fact of connection, and is always available to us when there’s nothing else getting in the way. And the thing that tends to get in the way is superstitious, outside-in thinking. Superstitious thinking arises from what I call the “outside-in misunderstanding”, the mistaken belief that our feelings are coming from somewhere other than the principle of thought in the moment. We all find ourselves in superstitious thinking from time to time, and when we do, the experience of connection rapidly evaporates. But the moment we insightfully see the inside-out nature of life, we fall out of our superstitious thinking and back into the moment. And when we fall back into the present moment, we find ourselves back in the experience of connection with our true selves, with other people, and with life as a whole.
So what does this have to do with coaching with clarity?
A sense of connection is the ‘transformation superhighway’ for coaches. When you’re in the experience of connection…
– You “carry your credibility”, giving your client a powerful and unique experience of who they really are
– You can impact your client deeply, with both of you being guided by wisdom
– You’re more available to insight, fresh new thinking that can help you and your client
– You’re in the space for genuine transformation
The experience of connection is natural for every person when there’s nothing else in the way. But the fact of connection is constant, even when you’re not aware of it. And here’s the cool thing: as you insightfully realise the fact of connection, the experience of connection becomes deeper and more frequent.
If you’d like to get a sense of the impact that understanding the principles behind clarity can have for you and your clients, check out the results people are getting on our Certified Clarity Practitioner Programme. I’m delivering the final module of the 2013/14 programme this weekend, and the 2014/15 programme starts in September. The first 31 people have already booked their places (six new clients since last week!), and the price goes up on June 30th, so have a look now to find out if it’s a good fit for you (live-streaming options also available). You can get access to the full information here: https://www.jamiesmart.com/cpp-page-1/